I wannas sexs uuuuu
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
