it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Randomize
