Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
