turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
