im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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