i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
it glows. i had to have it.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Randomize
