I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
