if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
