Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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