"it" just moved
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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