Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.�
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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