we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize