My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
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