omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize