it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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