Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
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