I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
