My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
This toilet bowl is my home.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
