Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
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