thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Randomize
