i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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