Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
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