I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Randomize
