do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking ros�, bitch!
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Randomize
