either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
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