Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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