summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize