I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
