worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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