After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
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