I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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