Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
My day in three words: secret purse cake
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Randomize
