So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
