Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I got inside last night via doggy door
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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