I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
