why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
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