You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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