my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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