It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
