it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Randomize
