Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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