Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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