love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
