At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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