Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize
