Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
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