let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
