she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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