If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Help. Why am I so naked?
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