and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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